# Finding Closure: A Journey of Healing and Acceptance
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Chapter 1: Understanding the Need for Closure
It’s likely that nearly everyone has faced a moment in life where they felt a lack of closure. This can stem from various experiences, such as relationships, events, struggles with addiction, or lifestyle choices. Many of us carry the weight of these unresolved feelings, which often leave us with wounds that seem impossible to heal.
One of the most challenging aspects of not achieving closure is that we can trick ourselves into believing we’ve moved past it. Over time, the emotional scars can start to feel less painful, leading us to think, “I’m fine. I’ve moved on.” However, this perception can shift dramatically when something triggers those buried feelings, exposing the rawness of the pain we thought was gone.
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Section 1.1: Personal Reflection on Closure
Take, for instance, my own experience. My biological father was absent throughout my childhood and early adulthood. At 26, I still consider myself in the early stages of adulthood. As a child, I yearned for his attention. In my teenage years, I felt hurt and anger. By adulthood, I believed I had overcome these feelings, especially with strong male role models in my life. On my wedding day, I didn’t think of my father at all. Yet, when my marriage ended, I found myself longing for the support of a father figure.
Initially, I thought I had moved on. However, life threw me a curveball. I learned that my biological father is gravely ill. My immediate reaction was numbness. As I contemplated the situation, I realized I had a limited time to come to terms with my feelings. Should I let him leave this world without expressing how his absence affected me? Would he ever recognize the person I’ve become, despite his absence?
I recognized that I hadn’t fully healed as I once believed. I reached out to him, and this blog post serves as a way of expressing those sentiments. I wanted him to know that I’ve thrived despite his absence and that I’ve been hurt by it. I needed him to understand that my feelings are complex: love, hate, and a sense of loss all intertwined.
"Deanz feat. Revel Day - A Little Closure" - This video explores the theme of finding closure in difficult relationships, highlighting the journey towards healing.
Section 1.2: The Journey Towards Healing
The act of confronting such emotions can be jarring, akin to an unexpected force that leaves you reeling. Days may pass before the reality truly sinks in. As I processed the news about my father, I found myself grappling with the weight of regret and curiosity about what life might have been like had he been more present.
I am fortunate to have father figures who are proud of me and who I strive to make proud in return. I’ve come to terms with my relationships with them, and their love provides a sense of fulfillment that I cherish. While it may not be easy to tell a dying man that he was unnecessary in my life, it was essential for my healing. I believe he may carry regrets of his own, perhaps my absence being one of them. However, that is now his burden to bear, not mine.
Chapter 2: The Importance of Seeking Closure
"A Little Closure..." - This video delves into the emotional journey of seeking closure and the transformative power it can bring to one's life.
Once you attain your own closure, the emotional wounds, while still present, become less infected by the toxicity of unresolved feelings. As a shaman, I strive to understand the complexities of human emotions, but as a daughter, I refuse to live my life filled with resentment towards someone who chose not to be present.
It is crucial to express your feelings openly and honestly, as that is the pathway to achieving closure. It may be daunting, and the realization that you need closure can be a harsh truth to confront. Yet, once you take that step, you can find peace.
So, I encourage you to seek out your own closure. You deserve to heal and move forward, just as everyone does.