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Avoiding Email Etiquette Pitfalls: 3 Key Questions to Ask

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Understanding the Impact of Email Mistakes

When was the last time you sent an email that made you cringe? You know, the kind that has you wishing for a "recall" button? In today's remote work environment, such experiences have become increasingly common. Have you ever paused to think, “What prompted me to write that?” or “What message was I really trying to convey?”

If your emails tend to be overly emotional, lengthy, or unnecessary, consider these three questions before you click send.

  1. Is This Message Driven by Emotion?

We've all experienced emails that provoke intense emotions—whether it’s a client backing out of a deal, a colleague being difficult, or receiving harsh feedback from a supervisor. It’s tempting to respond impulsively, which can escalate conflicts and lead to a messy exchange.

Tip: Instead of sending an emotionally charged reply, acknowledge receipt of the message and suggest a meeting—whether in person, via video, or by phone—to discuss it further. This approach prevents a lengthy email trail and keeps emotional discussions in a more suitable setting.

  1. Why Is This Email So Lengthy?

It’s easy to ramble when discussing complex topics. If crafting your email feels like it deserves its own time slot on your calendar, it might be too long.

Ask yourself: Am I including unnecessary details? Would it be more effective to discuss this in a meeting?

Tip: If drafting an email takes longer than three minutes, reevaluate whether you’re adding unnecessary content or if it would be better communicated in a meeting. You can always send a brief summary afterward.

  1. Does This Require a Response?

If you catch yourself wondering, “Why am I replying to this?” it’s likely a sign that you can skip the reply. Our inboxes are flooded with emails, and no one needs another unnecessary notification.

Some emails are simply statements, not questions, and can lead to information being shared that doesn’t need to be. Often, it's best to leave these messages unanswered, waiting to see if the topic arises again later.

Tip: Avoid the reflex to reply for the sake of replying. If your response doesn’t add value to the conversation, it’s better to remain silent. Also, steer clear of engaging with emails that feel more like bait than a genuine inquiry.

In Summary

Emails are a quick and essential communication tool in the business world, but poor practices can turn them into sources of anxiety. Prevent unnecessary conflicts by following these guidelines:

  • If your message stems from emotion, opt for a meeting instead.
  • Use the three-minute rule to assess if your message is too convoluted for email or would be more effective in a meeting.
  • Remember that not every email necessitates a reply; sometimes, the best response is no response at all.

Have you ever felt overwhelmed by email communication? Share your experiences in the comments, along with any email etiquette tips that work for you.

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